Sunday, April 25, 2010

10 Week 17 - Well, I'm The One Who Should Be Looked Down

Do you know the difference between your son and the others' sons? You would criticize the others' sons when you heard that they changed their job like changing clothes. You would see most of the youngsters nowadays as fragile vases who couldn't bear much working pressure. But when your son is one of the vases, you are totally okay with that. You are capable of rationalizing it.

My dad encouraged me to quit my job. Perhaps he'd had enough listening to my whine during every dinner.

Do you know the difference between "I" and the others?

When I heard Amy changed her job after working for only two months in an event company, I thought I would never do this kind of things. Amy, what's wrong with you? I might work at least six months no matter what. (This might be a good example of fundamental attribution error.) However, recently I'm planning to quit my job. No, there's nothing wrong with me. I'm just guiding myself walking from a deviant path.

I have cognitive dissonance when I work under the system. I don't like to force children non-stop doing homework. I don't agree to punish children in order to stop them keep asking me questions. I don't like to rush the syllabus as my students are slow learners. I don't like to use the teaching materials that do not match with students' standard. I don't think we are fully responsible for students' grades. I don't believe academic achievement is everything.

There are many other small issues that urge me to resign, but I should stop whining or this post would be very long. Actually if I'm doing something I like, which doesn't make me feel "that's not right," I don't mind to work long hours with heavy workload. Anyway, it doesn't mean there's nothing good to work for my boss. However the good side are not good enough to compensate the less attractive side.

In short, I've decided to quit. You may look down on me, like how the others' father might do. If you know me well, you know I don't care anyway.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

10 Week 16 - I'm Officially Graduated!

Convocation was tiring.

1. I had to wear formal, and even spent almost RM300 on it. Now I own a black suit and a dark blue tie which I have no idea when will I use them in future.

2. I didn't manage to see every people I wished to meet, although I tried to walk around to find them. I wished to take a photo with Fabio, Moon, Shanis, and Ray, however I failed to find them after the ceremony. I really feel bad for this.

3. There was no time for me to have deeper conversation with my friends. And the environment was not for doing so. We were too busy to attend to many people and things around us.

Convocation was fun.

1. Some people said I looked smart with my outfit.

2. Finally I have a photo taken with Ms. Winnee!

3. Lordson noticed that some of the graduands didn't smile when they came up to the stage. I said "It's because graduation means unemployment."

4. It was good to see many people again, and we were sharing the joy of graduation!

We are now heading toward our own direction. We're chasing our dream. I sincerely hope everyone can get what he/she really wants, and live happily with it.

Sunday, April 11, 2010

10 Week 15 - Fantasy/Dream

I was bisexual in the dream. I was into ShwuMey but she never knew it. HaiChiang was my best friend and he pursued her despite he knew how I felt about her. He thought I didn't know what had he done. However, ShwuMey had a new target, she told me she liked HonLim and she was going to get him. Even though she had just met him once on the street. I liked HonLim too, I thought to myself. The two persons I liked were going to be together? What had I left? HaiChiang came to me with a guilty face, I knew he wanted to confess. "I know you want to apologize. It's okay. Anyway, she isn't interested in you anymore," I said.

The dream was still vivid when I woke up, and I still remember it. I think this kind of drama would not happen in my life, but if I could experience once (it better be positive event, like someone suddenly holds me and then tries to kiss me and I slap the person and walk away), isn't it... fun?

Now you know why I always do projection :P

I have never thought about owning a company. I clearly know that I have no ability to run a company alone, and I have no ambition to be a boss. Even though my family always encourage me to open a tuition center, they never raise my interest. However, when my friends mentioned a plan to run a company together, I was totally excited. I would love to be their partner and work with them!

I think working with my lovely friends would be one of the best things in my life. At least I think they would let me do whatever I believe it's good for the customers. I still miss the days that we all worked together for school assignments. I was trusted and we never had argument no matter what happened. We discussed things in a nice restaurant. Working with them was totally enjoyable.

So I do hope we can really run a company together in future. Is it possible?

Sunday, April 4, 2010

10 Week 14 - I Cherish